switchkitty78: (purple ass)
Aw, missed steak and BJ day this year. Yes, I'm actually sad about that. Red meat and oral sex sound like a perfect day to me.

For a lark and after a tangentially related conversation with KB, I reread Kushiel's Dart. This did nothing for my desire to beat someone bruisy. Neither is the fact that I found my 18" wooden ruler last night.

Last night after fucking my ass sweet and slow, Kittyboy mischievously pointed out that he always fists me when I come home from NY. "Just giving you something to look forward to." Damn him.

No progress made on venturing forth to wmpe events. We'll see about the main wmpetng munch.

I'm sure I have to wait in a line that wraps around the country several times, but I have this insane desire to do wonderfully awful things to Rachel Maddow in a significant state of undress. Painfully intelligent dark haired/dark eyed women kinda make me weak in the knees.

I really really REALLY need a new Wahl coil. And some drip candles. And Slippery stuff. And maybe one of those rock and roll vibes that light up. It'd be like Studio 54 all up in my junk. And a celebrator. And one (okay two) of these floggers. Sigh. One of these days I will have a toy budget again. One of these days.
switchkitty78: (purple ass)
While reorganizing my toy/book cabinet, I ran across the capzaicin applicator I'd gotten ages ago but tested maybe once before. (It's usually sold next to the icy/hot - in fact, they're put out by the same company.) In the spirit of "always try something on yourself before you play with it on other people" I put a stripe of it behind both my knees and went about my evening.

...Jesus Christ. I'm now wondering if I tested it at all because I'd remember this. Either that or I didn't apply very much before, or to a less sensitive area or it's concentrated in potency or something in the while or so since I bought it, but goddamn. Pretty much nothing much happened for the first ten or so minutes other than a light tingling that could be chalked up to the stuff drying. And then it starts burning. And then it starts burning worse. And by that time it's absorbed into the skin so you either have to ice it down or grit your teeth and ride it out, and I'd of course stuck it on the backs of my knees so bending them or sitting down with the edges of seats digging into them (I was wearing shorts yesterday) was fairly torturous for a good six hours or so.

Further tests are needed however, as my left knee reacted far worse than my right to the point where the area of application actually turned red, got warm, and welted up as if I'd gotten caned. The right knee, while it still hurt, didn't react nearly as dramatically, so I'm wondering if I'd rubbed it accidentally into a raw spot, if I'm allergic to it, or this is par for the course. I'm guessing not the latter as most non-pervy people buy this stuff to relieve pain, not cause it. But after round one, my conclusion is to mark this stuff "FOR SEVERE PUNISHMENT ONLY." Either that or use as a lazy, painless (for you, not your bottom) shortcut for getting that "I'ma tan yer hide!" sensation.

TL;DR - yeowch!
switchkitty78: (Kitty)
Hey [livejournal.com profile] little_kit, do you have a long lost cousin? ;) There was a adorable young lady on collarme.com that reminded me of you, so I shot her a message. Pretty sure nothing's gonna come of it, but nothing ventured, right?

In other news, I don't know what it is about French bowlines, but it seems precisely how to do them slides out of my memory like a well greased... well. Anything. Much like how to tie half-Windsors. Something about knots and trying to remember how they go never seems to stick. Nothing for it but to practice, eh?

Also Kittyboy and I MIGHT be going to Home Depot later. Or as I like to put it, "The Grown-up Toy Store." Granted I won't really be getting anything majorly fun (I think I've decided mostly to get hooks and price organizer type thingies), but a gal can look at the chain and rope and zipties and brackets and D rings and s-hooks and dream wicked dreams, can't she?

I've ended every paragraph in this entry on a wistful question mark. That is a thing.

eep

Jul. 4th, 2010 11:02 pm
switchkitty78: (Kitty)
My vibrator is in the penalty box, and may possibly need replacing.

Either I didn't hear it when I left the house, or it fell behind the bed and turned itself on in the process, but I came home after a movie and walked into my bedroom to a melty plastic smell and an odd buzzing noise coming from under my bed. There was some swearing, followed by unplugging and fishing out of red hot vibrator from under the bed. Thankfully all is okay, the smell was either the interior of the vibrator or bits of the carpet melting. Not exactly sure which, though I'm going to go for the carpet, seeing as it was slightly crunchy when I felt it.

It may indeed be time to stop just replacing the wahl coils every year or so and find a new go-to sex toy (*cough* besides Kittyboy). I've heard insanely good things about The Celebrator, disturbing resemblance to my electric toothbrush notwithstanding. And by insanely good things, I mean I have heard the words "I came so hard I cried" from multiple sources. Um. Yeah. If that ain't a positive review, I don't know what is.

There's also The Sqweel, which looks... intriguing.

(Can I be intensely amused for a second that sex toys can be ordered through Amazon now? I mean... seriously.)

But yeah... that was an uncomfortably close brush with making the local papers for burning down a building with a sex toy. Though they'd probably refer to it as a "personal massager."
switchkitty78: (Anthy)
  • on rag.

  • a couple days out from shaving down the ladybits. Stubbly and itchy.

  • m.pornhub.com went mostly subscription a couple days ago. Now have to find another source of free ipod porn, because damn it free porn is one of my unalienable rights as a citizen of these here Internets.

  • my room reeks like buttercream frosting because Kittyboy left the lid off the Tasty Twist the other day. Which normally is a good thing except I've been craving actual cake something fierce anyway.

  • want to beat someone's ass black and blue.

  • want new toys, can't afford new toys.

  • stressed out about life the universe and everything and as such want to fuck everything in sight.


Phooey.
switchkitty78: (flogger)
Nothing like finding a perfect accessory to your arsenal and having it set you back less than $3. Just saying.

Wish lists

Mar. 9th, 2010 01:05 pm
switchkitty78: (lovecats)
I keep forgetting to write up the Athena's party I went to and its resultant hijinks. Course I don't have too too much to say other than royally enjoying being in a room full of friends who are also yummy curvy women being peddled sex toys and spa products by another yummy curvy women. *sigh* I'm kinda sad the market around here is so saturated for Athenas goddesses, I'd be one in a heartbeat. Me? go to people's houses with a suitcase of yummy smelling self-spoilage and sexy stuff and spend a couple of hours putting the shy at ease about their bodies and desires with silly/raunchy anecdotes? Um, yeah that's an unimaginable line of work for me, lol, I'd not be good at that at ALL. Ah well, if for some reason I move away, maybe. Meantime I sit and comtemplate the woeful state of my toy/sexy stuff collection, which I haven't updated or added to much in the past few years owing to lack of money, disinterest, and health drama.

Still, I do have one rather delicious aftermath of the party, other than the Amazon's soon to be husband stiking dramatic poses and saying "PENIS" with a delightfully hilarious lisp. During the party the Goddess had me wander off and try something called "Tasty Twist" which is a little bit of creme with menthol in it made to taste delicious and, um, stimulate whatever area you put it on (in my case, right on my clit). Oh my. That stuff is delightfully squirm inducing. My roommate, seeing how much I enjoyed that little bit of torture, graciously unearthed an unopened jar of it she had left over from a different Athena's party and gave it to me for Kittyboy and I to play with. While it didn't seem to affect him as much as it did me, the fact that both of us smelled/tasted like vanilla frosting afterwards (indeed, I was still smelling it a day or so later long after the warm tinglies had worn off was amusingly delicious. Not to mention we did have some pretty delicious sex while using it.

Still, I do have a wish list a mile long, and will be keeping that particular goddess card around for a bit. I will be making a small order at the end of the week (paycheck providing), but will definitely be putting some aside for a larger order later in the spring. I've decided I want a twist and shout vibe finally - I had been spoiled on the battery operated ones since getting Fisher Price My First Wahl coil - and I am intrigued by the recommendation the Goddess had for this item called the Celebrator - said that it made her orgasm so hard she cried. Um... yeah okay, I could get behind that, lol. Plus I wouldn't mind having one of those jelly cock rings+bullet vibe combinations, since I love what cock rings do for Kittyboy, but he's not so okay about the chafing the two we've tried cause. In kinkier news, sportsheets sound incredibly fun >:) and I still want a couple of decent thwacky toys, like a pair of cowhide mop floggers.

But yeah, stuff to consider when I have my lovely little pipe dreams that tend to begin "Someday when I actually have money..."

Mmmm

Feb. 19th, 2010 05:05 pm
switchkitty78: (Milady's marque)
  • I need to find excuses to wear corsets more. Also someday when I have teh mad moneys (hahahaha) I'm going to find or commission one that accommodates my behind. The corset I have is grand, no mistake, but it was intended for a woman with a somewhat longer torso and definitely less junk in the trunk. Seriously, if this were 1890, I wouldn't require a bustle, thank you.

  • seeing Ms. Viviane and lil'bunny's hauls from the flea made me a little sad I did not in fact go. However, in perspective keeping terms, I didn't have the money to spend, and I know that HAD I spent the money anyway, much of of my haul wouldn't get used all that often anyway. Still, got to play with and appreciate all of their lovely toys last night, so not a total loss. Also they brought back vendor information for shopping purposes later, so I may yet fix this.

  • dear fates, I need someone's ass to terrify/beat/abuse. Been feeling the need to be utterly sadistic to someone who will revel deliriously in it and at this point in the game, Kittyboy seems to be having far too much fun on the handle end of the toys than the business end. Not that I'm complaining because that has been a crapton of completely unexpected fun, but I do want to get my teeth and nails into someone without either feeling stupid or shy about it. Associating with/the idea of cute but unavailable subs like lil'bunny, gingerpixie and my dear "little sister" have not been helpful, and I'm not good at/with venturing out of my safe zone in search of people to play with. Le Grumble. I suppose this is why I've been poking my toes into the local scene, but still *whine* Man, being shy sucks, especially in a scene where fortune favors the bold.

  • my roommate is about to go away for the weekend. ORGYTIEM IN 3...2...1... lol. Well not really, but I imagine some getting mildly tipsy and ending up on the living room floor for some Olympic level marathon fucking will probably happen sometime in the next couple of days. :)

GRRR

Feb. 18th, 2010 12:37 pm
switchkitty78: (leather)
It should not be this hard to find a metal standard ruler WITHOUT the cork backing. JUST SAYING.

*grumble grumble fuck you staples grumble*

Flea blahs

Feb. 3rd, 2010 11:16 am
switchkitty78: (kitten)
Still waffling on whether to actually go to the damn flea or not. Money may make it a moot point, since I really need to take my car in, and regardless should do that before thinking about driving all the damn way to Providence and back. But also I'm sensing a closing up and shutting down on the kink end of my sexuality right now, which is frustrating because I'm just now sticking my foot back into The Scene as a more or less independent agent and do want to continue doing that... so I'm super annoyed at myself, but experience dictates not much to do for it than either sit and wait for my libido to come out of contraction phase and figure out what triggered it. Honestly it's not just kink, I definitely seem to be in curl up and run away mode sexually, so something's definitely going on.

Feh.

After watching this video yesterday, I think I need to take stock of my cute underwear and think about some cheesecake shots of myself, either taking them myself or recruiting someone to take them for me. Might also help with the aforementioned issues, as I've been feeling significantly less than cute lately, let alone sexy. :P

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